Speaking of resolutions, quoters of statistics often say that a full 30 percent of New Year’s resolutions are broken by the end of January. This article says that less than 30 percent of New Year’s resolutions ever achieve success. If the waning crowds at my YMCA in late January are any indication, these numbers are probably pretty accurate.

So what can you do to make your New Year’s resolution stick? I’ve put a few links at the end of this post to some articles that I think are worth reading on this topic. Last year, I took a friend’s advice and made some SMART goals, which I wrote  about here.  I don’t think the approach worked any better for me, but I’m going to try it again this year. I really, really, really need to incorporate some strength training/toning into my exercise routine. I run ALOT because I love it. It’s my “drug of choice.” But I keep getting flabbier and flabbier. Running doesn’t tone and it doesn’t make you stronger — it simply burns calories and gets those endorphins flowing.

My husband, teen and I also are doing a weight-loss challenge. I won’t share any numbers, but each of us is trying to lose 5 percent of our body weight. The first one to the goal gets a $50 mall gift card, paid for by the other two. We’re still working out the details of this challenge, but I’m hoping we can keep each other accountable.

I will say this — my most successful New Year’s Resolutions have been the ones that I’ve really thought through and written down IN DETAIL. That’s linked to the whole SMART goals thing, and I neglected to do that last year. So, before January 1, I’m going to write down the details regarding how I’m going to go about achieving my New Year’s resolutions this year. How about you?

Additional New Year’s resolutions articles/posts:

Article 1

Article 2

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I’ve carried this “tradition” of family meals into my own family. We eat together whenever possible. We used to eat dinner really early (by 5 p.m.) because my husband worked extremely early hours which required him to hit the sack by around 7:30 p.m.  His schedule recently changed, and he’s seldom home before 7 p.m. these days. Guess what — we now gather at the table around 7:30 p.m. for dinner. (It’s amazing how much more my toddler eats now that she is ABSOLUTELY STARVING at dinner time.)

The benefits of sharing meals together have been lauded through the years. According to GatherRoundtheTable.com, a recent study by the National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse at Columbia University corroborated many previous studies and found that the more often children and teens eat dinner with their families, the less likely they are to smoke, drink and use drugs!

In fact, children and teens who have frequent family meals:
·    are at half the risk for substance abuse compared to teens
     who dine with their families infrequently.
·    are less likely to have friends or classmates who use illicit
     drugs or abuse prescription drugs.
·    have lower levels of tension and stress at home.
·    are likelier to say they can confide in their parents.
·    are likelier to get better grades in school.
·    are more likely to be emotionally content and have positive
     peer relationships.
·    have healthier eating habits
·    are at lower risk for thoughts of suicide
·    are less likely to try marijuana or have friends who use
     marijuana.

Insisting that family dinnertime was a must is something Nikki Stauffer learned from an early age and then continued with her own family. “By gathering children around the dinner table every night,” Stauffer explains, “our parents taught us that there is so much more to share than just a meal. It’s the place to strengthen bonds, build personal character and encourage each other. Not only did we each have our own ’seat’ (that no one else dare take), we had a ’spot’ in the family that no one could replace.”

When friends and other parents she met seemed to think this was a novel idea, Stauffer founded GatherRoundTheTable.com as a way to encourage other parents to have a family dinner every night (or as often as possible). She had seen firsthand the value and importance of family dinners before learning the statistics noted above. These studies just encouraged her to do her part through her web site.

The site, which began as a grassroots movement, has steadily gained momentum. Today, the site offers podcast interviews with celebrities, authors and parenting experts, articles and recipes submitted by many of the guests on the weekly podcast show.

While there are many parenting sites that offer a wonderful array of information, GRTT focuses primarily on the family table and its importance in the growth and development of our children.

 In addition to gathering families around the table, GRTT also wants to encourage gathering friends around the table as well. Deep and binding friendships are as important to everyone’s well being as family members. So welcoming friends of the children, friends of the parents, even neighbors or others you might want to get to know better, is also advocated. Whether it is to enjoy a home-cooked meal or a delivered pizza, this brief time together offers everyone a safe haven from the world around us, encouraging deeper bonds and relationships that help sustain us through difficult times, and let us rejoice in accomplishments both large and small.

I like these ideas. How about you? What methods do you employ to make family dinner time happen in your home?

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This post was written by Lisa Bertrand of St. Louis Family Life. You can read the rest of the post  here.

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In 2008, nearly 12,000 people in the United States were killed in alcohol-impaired driving crashes. During the periods around Christmas and New Year’s, this number was particularly high, with 316 people killed in alcohol-impaired driving crashes.  In 2007, 162,493 women were arrested for a DUI, an increase of almost 29% since 1998. (Can you say Bunco? Girls’ Night Out? Cookie Exchanges? Ornament Exchanges? It seems the opportunities to gather and celebrate and drink are endless these days).

Buzzed driving IS drunk driving.

You can’t help but wonder if lives could have been saved if people thought twice before getting behind the wheel. Sometimes, just TWO drinks is enough to be “buzzed” and (I’ll say it again): BUZZED DRIVING IS DRUNK DRIVING.

With the holidays approaching, it’s important that drivers be reminded about the dangers of buzzed driving.  Who knows…it could save a life.

Yesterday, I participated in a Twitter event for this campaign hosted by Resourceful Mommy and the Buzzed Driving/Ad Council, and learned some interesting things, such as:

• In 2008, 16 percent of child traffic fatalities occurred in alcohol impaired driving crashes (remember, most children DON’T HAVE THE OPTION TO OPT OUT OF RIDING WITH AN IMPAIRED DRIVER, SO BE RESPONSIBLE).
• 140-plus people died last year during the Christmas season from alcohol-impaired driving.
• 173 people died last year during the New Year’s holiday period due to alcohol-impaired driving.
• Drinking lots of water before drinking alcohol will NOT help you stay sober longer. (Neither will food or charcoal tablets). The best remedy is to NOT DRINK AND DRIVE.

The National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHSTA) and the Ad Council are asking everyone to drive smart this holiday season and to pledge not to drive buzzed. I don’t drink, but I took the pledge anyway. You can take the pledge here, then tell your kids, friends and family that you did so and encourage them to do the same thing. It’s a great New Year’s Resolution that you can make early!

Other ways you can help spread the word and perhaps save a life this holiday season:

• Become a fan of the campaign on Facebook.
• Follow the campaign on Twitter.
• Visit the campaign Web site to watch Emily’s story and play an interactive game that demonstrates the difference between buzzed and drunk.
• If you have a blog, copy and paste this information into a post on your site!

While at holiday events, it’s easy to lose track of a drink here or there – but this can be fatal.  This holiday season, keep you and your family safe by spreading this message.

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First, it’s helpful to watch this video because it does a much better job explaining things and it’s a really cool video:

So, you ask: What exactly IS Advent Conspiracy? It’s a movement to help us do four things to make sure Christmas continues to change the world:

1. Worship Fully
2. Spend Less
3. Give More (and give relationally, as in your time)
4. Love All

Here is the AC history: Four years ago, three pastors asked one question: What happened to Christmas? What should be a time focused on celebrating the birth of Jesus has become a season consumed with stress and debt. They created the Advent Conspiracy, a movement that encourages people to return to the holistic worship of Jesus during Christmas by pushing back on over-consumerism, giving more relationally, and supporting those who really need help. What started with three pastors is now a worldwide movement that has raised millions of dollars for charity by thousands of churches and business leaders in more than 17 countries. And it all started in my hometown — St. Louis.

So, Moms and Mommy Bloggers — I’m inviting you into the story. I’m asking you to do two things: 1) Conspire to change Christmas in your own homes and in your own communities by participating in Advent Conspiracy in your own way, small or large (keep reading to find out how);and, 2) Spread the word about Advent Conspiracy via your own blogs, on Facebook or by word of mouth. (Please send me links via comments or to lipsticktocrayons@gmail.com, so I can promote your efforts in future posts!)

I plan to offer you more information soon, hopefully a Q & A interview with one of the creators of the amazing video I shared with you, as well as some stories of people who have “entered the story” and some posts on ideas of how you can “give more” while “spending less.”  In the meantime, if you’d like more ideas on how to get involved, you can do any number of things:

• Visit the Advent Conspiracy Web site.
• Become a fan of the Advent Conspiracy page on Facebook.
• If you live anywhere near the St. Louis area and are an educator, church leader (pastor, youth leader, team leader, secretary, etc.), an educator, journalist or blogger and would like to attend an event designed to help you get started, go here. Greg Holder, the lead pastor of The Crossing and one of the people who started AC, will share more about this movement and how you can integrate it into your season planning. Plus, Albert Pujols will share his passion for The Pujols Family Foundation and how it’s making small steps for big change with children both locally and globally.
• Buy the Advent Conspiracy book (authored by those three pastors mentioned above). There also is a DVD. You can purchase both of them here or on Amazon. I’m reading the book now and even though I’m already familiar with the conspiracy and I’m already “on board” with the idea, the book is helping me form ideas in my head and helping really focus on the true meaning of Christmas. I can’t wait to celebrate the birth of Christ this year. Advent Conspiracy is helping me to embrace the holiday with my heart and I hope it will help you do the same.

So, as the video says: “This is the new tradition. This is YOUR new tradition. This is how the story gets told. Love all. Spend less. Give more. Worship fully. Tell the story of Christmas. Tell the story of the newborn King, who came to Earth, and changed history, power, humanity, intimacy, hope, everything! This is Christmas. This is our story. This is Advent Conspiracy.”

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————–

We’ve all experienced mean girls.  And most/all of us have probably been mean girls at one time or another (or another, or another). I recently had the pleasure of  listening to an amazing lecture on the subject of “mean girls” that really got to the heart of the matter for me as a mother.

As I’ve mentioned, I’m currently doing the Beth Moore Bible study, “Esther: It’s Tough Being a Woman”. During today’s video lesson, Beth (if you do one of her studies, you come to think of her as a friend and start calling her by her first name) shared some very insightful things about meanness, many of which were Bible-based. Some of my favorite thoughts were:

• Meanness alwayshas a history. (Isn’t that so true? We may not want to admit it, but there is always a story behind someone’s meanness — even our own).
• There is nothing meaner than a coward. (‘Nuf said.)
• Meanness catches like a virus and we can spread it down from generation to generation or horizontally to those with whom we come in contact. (This truth makes my stomach hurt. I think as women and mothers we must, must, must acknowledge our responsibility in NOT spreading the meanness virus.)
• We are most likely to compare ourselves to someone we perceive as a threat. (Why is that? I believe it’s true, but it baffles me.)
• Insecurity is at the heart of every rivalry. (Duh! This one is so obvious, I almost didn’t include it. But it’s a good reminder, whether we’re the ones feeling insecure or the “rival” of the one feeling insecure.) 
• Coming in contact with a mean girl raises up your own mean girl. (AMEN!) 
• Meanness is curable. Don’t repay evil with evil. (This is one that’s easy to skim over because Beth uses the word “evil.” We don’t think of our actions as evil. But what if you swap out the word “evil” with “harsh words” or “gossip” or “the silent treatment” or “criticism?” Then it hits a little closer to home, eh? 
• Be nice to your mean girl. Don’t serve her or bow down to her, but be nice until her heart sears with conviction. (This one is along the lines of love your enemy. Or  pray for your enemy. I have often been given this advice. Sometimes I’ve followed it. It ALWAYS helps — it might only help me, but it always helps.)

Okay — if you can’t relate to EVERY one of these sentiments, wisdoms, facts — whatever you want to call them — then you don’t have two X chromosomes. But there are probably a few that really strike a chord. For me, it’s the “coming in contact with a mean girl raises up your own mean girl.”

When I became a mother, I thought I’d inherently develop a tenderness and protection toward all children. And for the most part, that’s what happens — unless said child does something to one of MY children. Whoa! I did not know I could have such evil thoughts toward someone who hadn’t even reached puberty until a wicked little second-grader spread her meanness to my first born many years ago. My husband wasn’t even sure he knew the woman who expressed those somewhat-violent fantasies with him.

That’s why I was so thankful to hear Beth talk about a similar reaction in relation to one of her daughters and a nemesis. It’s helpful and healing to know that we’re not alone and that “coming in contact with a mean girl raises up your own mean girl.”

Still, that doesn’t excuse us when we act like mean girls, and it doesn’t excuse us when we simply have “mean girl” thoughts. So, I prayed for forgiveness for any mean girls thoughts I’ve had recently and not so recently. And I’m sure I’ll have to do so again – and again, and again. How about you?

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Michael Rebando, a Long Island locksmith of two decades, experienced a near-tragic incident in which his four-year-old niece was rushed to the hospital after unknowingly consuming over-the-counter medication accidentally left on the kitchen counter.  After conducting his own research, Rebando discovered that in addition to the alarming number of toddler incidents, a reported 2.1 million teens are abusing prescription drugs annually and more than a third of the prescription drugs illegally obtained by teens come from their own homes.

Plus, according to a recent report by the CDC, each year in the United States more than 71,000 children age 18 and younger are seen in emergency rooms for unintentional overdoses of prescription and over-the-counter drugs.  It also reported that about one out of every 180 two-year-olds visits an emergency department for a medication overdose each year.

In an effort to help parents keep their meds safely secured and their children out of harm’s way, Rebando developed an electronic lock-box called MedSafe, which debuted this week. Fitting easily into most existing medicine cabinets and holding up to 15 bottles of prescription medicine, the state-of-the-art lock-box features 19,500 changeable combinations and is the perfect tool in keeping potentially harmful meds out of the hands of children. The MedSafe can be easily affixed to the inside of any medicine cabinet with four self-tapping screws included with each unit, and can also be stored in a dresser drawer, kitchen cabinet or closet shelf.

A portion of each unit sold will support teen prescription drug abuse awareness programs through non-profits such as D.A.R.E. The product is presently available at www.helpsaveourkids.com for $49.95, and will soon be available in retail outlets nationwide. But one lucky Lipstick to Crayons reader is going to win one for free by entering the contest below.

Giveaway Guidelines

To enter this contest, tell me why you’d like to win in a comment below.

Receive additional entries by doing any/all of the following, but be sure to leave a separate comment for each thing you do:

1. Blog about this contest
2. Subscribe to my mailing list/RSS feed
3. Tweet this giveaway on Twitter
4. Favorite Lipstick to Crayons on Technorati
5. Stumble this post
6. Add Lipstick to Crayons to your blogroll or my button to your sidebar

This giveaway closes at 11:59 p.m. Central time Oct. 20, 2009. Be sure to include a valid email address. Winner will be randomly chosen via random.org and will be notified via email and announced on this post.

If winner does not claim prize by Oct. 22,  2009, she/he will forfeit the prize to alternate winner who will be drawn at random.

This contest is closed. Congratulations to Bridget G., you are the winner. I’ll be sending you an email shortly.

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Gis4Girl was launched in December 2008  by print designer Erin Boudreau. Erin designed her products with one purpose in mind — to create fun and meaningful clothes for amazing girls.  The designs are clean, unique and clever, and through them, Gis4Girl strives to encourage all girls (and women) from all walks of life to achieve their fullest potential.

Erin sent me a couple of her products to try (a zip-up hoodie with the message “You Grow Girl” on the back) and a Sm:)e t-shirt. Both products are well-made, fun and adorable. My teen grabbed the t-shirt and has worn it several times already. I got to keep the hoodie (for now).

To help you get acquainted with some of her products, Erin is offering a is G is 4 Girl’s “Positive-ly Cool School Pak” to one lucky reader of Lipstick to Crayons.  It includes three items: the black Sm;)e t-shirt, the “Girls are A-Mazing” messenger bag, and the “Positive Words” lined journal – total value of $60.

Giveaway Guidelines

To enter this contest, visit Gis4Girl and come back her and mention a product you like in a  comment below.

Receive additional entries by doing any/all of the following, but be sure to leave a separate comment for each thing you do:

1. Blog about this contest
2. Subscribe to my mailing list/RSS feed
3. Tweet this giveaway on Twitter
4. Favorite Lipstick to Crayons on Technorati
5. Stumble this post
6. Add Lipstick to Crayons to your blogroll or my button to your sidebar

This giveaway closes at 11:59 p.m. Central time Oct. 19, 2009. Be sure to include a valid email address. Winner will be randomly chosen via random.org and will be notified via email and announced on this post.

If winner does not claim prize by Oct. 21,  2009, she/he will forfeit the prize to alternate winner who will be drawn at random.

This contest is closed. Congrats to Rebecca C., comment #112.

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———–

June 15^th, 2009 should have been the happiest day in Debbie and Ken’s life.  After spending more than two weeks at Missouri Baptist Medical Center in St. Louis on bed rest, Debbie Martinez Goff gave birth to three healthy and beautiful babies: Kyle, Cara, and Molly.  Debbie’s oldest son, Ben, 6, finally had the three siblings he had hoped to receive.

Debbie and Ken were overjoyed – but their elation was short lived.  As Debbie was being wheeled out of the operating room, she suffered a sudden, lethal and extremely rare delivery complication called Amniotic Fluid Embolism that resulted in cardiac arrest.

The nurses and physicians, acting immediately, brought Debbie back to life.  However, the damage from this event was catastrophic to Debbie’s organs.  She needs a ventilator to breathe, dialysis in place of functioning kidneys, and is fighting everyday to keep her liver functioning. She has suffered multiple cardiac arrests.

A tragic cascade of further complications has left Debbie on life support systems since that day – unable to speak, move, and most saddening – unable to care for and bond with her babies who were born 6 and 1/2 weeks premature.  And her future is cloudy and uncertain.  She has a tracheotomy, continues full time kidney dialysis, is still draining excess fluid from her body, receives an antibiotic for an unknown infection/excess white blood cell count, has received more than 100 units of  blood, and is being prescribed antidepressants to help her deal with depression due to her condition.

The devastation from this horrible event is widespread.  It has left Debbie unable to work, care and nurture her newborns together with Ken, or run a household of four young children with the unexpected expenses related to that task.  Ken is obviously under unbelievable stress.

So far, Ken has relied upon the help of family and others just to “get by”.  The babies are now home and are being watched in shifts.   Meals are cooked and delivered by volunteers.  This has allowed Ken to be at Debbie’s side around-the-clock, providing her with love and encouragement to keep the fight for her life going.

A distressing reality has begun to set in as Debbie’s family digs in for a long, long road to her recovery.  It is not clear that she will ever be normal again.  Any recovery will come after months of rehabilitation.

It has become very clear that more in-depth assistance is required in order for Debbie and her family to survive this ordeal and be able to offer Kyle, Cara, Molly and Ben a fighting chance for a normal life.

Debbie has now been in an Intensive Care Unit for six weeks.  While the medical costs are not fully known at this point, they will be huge and not even close to fully covered by insurance.  And her expenses are separate from the hospital and doctor care for three premature babies, one of whom also needed a surgery following his birth.

The family is working to deal with their huge, devastating financial demands as best they can.  To this end, a medical expense fund has been established.  If you are able to help Debbie, Ken, Kyle, Molly and Cara, and Ben, you can make a contribution directly to:

Bank of America,  Deborah M. Goff – Medical Fund

ATTN:  Patti Hickey, 15115 Manchester Road Ballwin, MO 63011

From Ken and all of the family and friends of Debbie, we thank you for taking your time to read Debbie’s story and for any assistance that you may be able to offer.

————

I have had the honor and privilege to be among the dozens of volunteers to help care for these beautiful babies. In the few short hours I have spent with them, I can already see their distinctive personalities emerging. Cara fights sleeping and wants to held facing outward so she can see everything that is going on around her. Molly is content to be cradled in your arms  and seems more laid back than her sister.  Kyle seems happiest when he is snuggled up against your neck and shoulder.  I share these observations with you to make these babies and the plight of their family more real.  In doing so, I hope you will be encouraged to contribute to Debbie’s fund in any way you can. I also hope that in addition to any money you can give, you will also give your prayers.  Jesus is the Great Healer, and I ask that you pray for Him to heal Debbie and return her to the family that loves and needs her so very much.

NOTE: If you have a blog or Web site, I ask that you copy this story and paste it on your site if you are so inclined. —  Michelle Cox, owner of Lipstick to Crayons

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